Author Archive

Vince McMoments: “I’m sorry, I find that comedic.”

August 15, 2009

sammy

“Pro Wrestling’s Hold On America” was a 1999 episode of ESPN’s Outside The Lines probably most notable for its coverage of wrestler deaths, but it was also fun to watch at times.  One of these times was when they showed Vince McMahon footage of the infamous skit involving Mark Henry and Chyna’s friend Sammy where they get amorous, leading to Henry uttering the immortal words “Oh!  Sweet Jesus! You got a penis!”

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Great moments in Brock Lesnar history: Brock throws around Big Show

August 15, 2009

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When Brock Lesnar was in OVW as a developmental wrestler, it was noted how insane his suplexes were.  Insanely strong and used to throwing around big dudes in legitimate competition, his suplexes on cooperating pro wrestlers were like nothing anyone had ever seen before.  Once he was called up to the main roster and quickly won the WWE title, he had two obvious potential challengers: Kurt Angle, the only ex-amateur in the company even more decorated than Lesnar, and the Big Show, the giant who only Brock Lesnar could suplex at will.

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Linda McMahon considering running for US Senate

August 14, 2009

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According to the Morning Fix on the Washington Post’s website, a source close to Linda McMahon says she is “seriously considering” running for the US Senate seat representing Connecticut that is currently held by Democrat Chris Dodd.  I got nothin’.

“Hell’s Kitchen” contestant Van Hurd is Luna Vachon’s son

August 14, 2009

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Saw this in today’s NY Daily News wrestling column by The Slammer:

The latest edition of “Hell’s Kitchen” (Ch. 5, 8 p.m., Tuesdays) features contestant Van Hurd, whose mom is ex-WWE star Luna Vachon.

According to Wikipedia, Van is the product of Luna’s marriage to childhood friend Tom Nash, a pro wrestler who teamed with Luna’s eventual 2nd husband, David Heath (Gangrel/Vampire Warrior) as the Blackhearts.

Old Mid-South/UWF shows now airing daily on TuffTV

August 12, 2009

TuffTV (whatever that is, the website doesn’t work; it might be one of those networks only on over the air digital subchannels) is now airing old Mid-South shows every day, in order.  There’s a schedule here.

Vince McMoments: Stand Back

August 11, 2009

So, you’re Vince McMahon in 1987.  Your wrestling company is releasing its second record album.  Jim Crockett, the guy you sold the coveted TBS wrestling deal to, is making a desperate national expansion that included buying a dying territory (in the midst of its own desperate national expansion) for millions of dollars so he could then pay millions more for said territory’s TV clearances.  Your next step is obvious.  You record a Jim Crockett diss track under the guise of an Andre the Giant tribute.

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Vince McMoments: “GET ON YOUR HANDS AND KNEES LIKE A DOG!”

August 9, 2009

I figured I should post this one next since it was excerpted during the Costas interview. ..

After Trish Stratus tried to turn on Vince for the first time, he made her apologize to him as ridiculously as possible in one of the most infamous segments in Raw history and possibly the Vince-est segment ever on WWF/E programming (it would be this or “Stand Back” at the Slammys, one would think).  During the course of this piece of politically incorrect television, we get the following Vince quotes:

“Get on your hands and knees like a dog!  Get on your hands and knees like a dog, okay!  I used to have a female dog and that bitch did everything I told her to, NOW DAMMIT, GET DOWN, GET DOWN!”

“YEAH, THAT’S IT!  CRAWL AROUND THE RING LIKE A DOG!  YOU’RE SORRY!  YOU’RE SORRY FOR MR. MCMAHON!   YEAH, YOU’RE SORRY”

“Now then, I want you to tell me in dog language just how sorry you are!  Okay?  Yeah, tell me in dog language!  Speak, Trish, speak!  YEAH, BARK LIKE A DOG!”

“I’ve seen you on all fours before, they haven’t.  Y’know what, Trish?  I’ve seen you in other ways and they haven’t.”

“If you’re really sorry, I’m wondering what color panties you’re wearing tonight, Trish!”

“If you’re reeeaaalllyyy, reeeeeeealllly sorry, take your skirt off, AND TAKE IT OFF NOW!”

“Are you sorry enough now Trish?  Are you sorry enough for Mr. McMahon?  You know what?  I don’t think so!  No, you’re not sorry enough for Mr. McMahon, so everybody that’s watching at home, I’m warning you now, everybody that’s in this arena, turn your back if you don’t want to see this.  You’re sorry!  Oh yeah, you’re sorry!  TAKE YOUR BRA OFF AND TAKE IT OFF NOW! TAKE IT OFF, TRISH!”

It’s terrifying, but it’s full of Vinceness.

Video after the jump (not 100% work safe due to Vince’s insane proclamations and Trish’s state of undress).

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Vince McMoments: THAT Bob Costas interview

August 9, 2009

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As the XFL was going down the tubes in 2001, Vince McMahon went on Bob Costas’s one on one HBO talk show, “Costas Now.”  It got confrontational pretty quickly, which Vince in fine form, accusing Costas of being “unprepared” in talking about things like the “Suck It!” catchphrase (when DX was split up) as well as calling him “an elitist” for saying that that the (then)-WWF was perceived as low-brow.  In defending the acceptabilty of his programming, Vince noted that none of his shows use “the fuck word,” which was commonly used on HBO’s “The Sopranos” while “ass” was bleeped on Smackdown, as well as explaining that the WWF was relatively non-violent given its lack of rape, murder, and use of household objects as weapons (ahem).  Costas later described the interview as “…nearly 26 minutes, face-to-face, with half of it at a high level of anger”  Video after the jump in four parts.

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Randy Savage shoved a steak down his pants

August 3, 2009

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I haven’t been keeping up with former USWA referee/manager Scott Bowden’s Kentucky Fried Rasslin columns like I should have, but he’s posted some great stuff recently, including a great column about Randy Savage’s early career, the highlight of which is:

Savage and his rival Garvin (then nicknamed the “One Man Gang”…years before ICW wrestler Crusher Broomfield would use the same moniker as a headliner in the UWF and WWF) often cut televised shoot-like promos on each other, more than a decade before those type of interviews became almost the norm in ECW and WCW. For example, when Savage’s shoplifting arrest for attempting to walk out of a Kentucky supermarket with a steak stuffed down his jeans made the local newspaper, Garvin brought out the clipping on the show to humiliate the so-called heavyweight champion of the world.

If anyone is able to Photoshop a steak into a pic of Savage digging a foreign object out of his trunks from when he won the Intercontinental title, they will be my hero.

Lots of good stuff including some columns about Tampa mayoral candidate Austin Idol at KentuckyFriedWrestling.com.

Great moments in commercials: Widower + hair dye = new mommy

August 1, 2009

Over the years, many commercials have been embedded in the minds of wrestling fans based on how much they ran on wrestling programming.  How many fewer ads for Skittles and motor oil would we have seen in our lives if we weren’t wrestling fans?  Anyway, we start with the most memorable ad currently running during Smackdown every week, after the jump…

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